<meta name='google-adsense-platform-account' content='ca-host-pub-1556223355139109'/> <meta name='google-adsense-platform-domain' content='blogspot.com'/> <!-- --><style type="text/css">@import url(https://www.blogger.com/static/v1/v-css/navbar/3334278262-classic.css); div.b-mobile {display:none;} </style> </head><body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/platform.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar/33033460?origin\x3dhttp://wondrousky.blogspot.com', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>
P
A
L
E
"Have to fight, cause I know in the end it's worthwhile, that the pain that I feel slowly fades away. It will be all right."


Pale
By: Within Temptation

title:
Saturday, May 31, 2008 AT 5/31/2008 01:12:00 AM


been attending sch for the week. wound's getting better already although i noe it's still a long way to fully recover. been always hoping i was healthy yet still this yr was not a very gd yr for me ever since it started happening. 2 weeks of absentee was rather a hard period of time to catch up with my classmates. it was such a struggle. din noe how to go abt studying and stuffs. everything seems to be in a mess. my life seems to be in a mess no matter in wad situation. from the outside it's juz so messed up.

ct is next week. 4 papers on 4 days except tues. a tough period to go through i guess. misses out so many things during the 2 weeks. wondering how would my coming ct fare? hmmms out of 4 modules i'm only kinda confident on 2 and the other 2 i dunno how to do. it's juz so hard to understand and apply. not very confident of scoring well for this term. also i've change my way of studying i guess. i dun used to write out the notes but relying on reading most of the time. but i did it this time round. been hearing different stories about different people recently. too much of it until i felt there's prob in me too.

i felt of escaping everything from reality. i do not wan to face it. i felt so stressed up with things recently. juz feel lyk bursting out already. hmmms things getting so hard up recently. plus i'm not fully well. i felt trapped inside my own self. i cant control myself anymore. i felt so restless. hopeless. and useless now. feeling so weak both in the inside and the outside. i'm such a failure. i've nv been lyk this before. maybe i'm juz changing.

need time alone and left alone i guess...................


mood: moody and down =/

back to the top


title:
Sunday, May 25, 2008 AT 5/25/2008 12:35:00 PM


hmmm this whole week nth much to blog about. it's a damn boring week. as other than going to school to submit my mc. other than tat i've been staying home for the week. cant go anywhere cause my wound is still recovering. but people who are concern. i'm better already and recovering well so thanx for concern people.

anyway staying home is the most boring thing to do. cause there's nth much better to do and i've been watching tv for the whole week. it's damn sianz cause the shows keep repeating from time to time. so bored. i really wonder how those people could endure such a living. even scv channels although i only watch a few channels. the shows are repeating itself which makes my whole week so bored and tired of staying at one. one reason was becos of that. the other reason was because maybe i'm one who lyks going out and play and not always staying at home. so it makes my life very bored. nth to do.

another thing was. a lot of things i cant eat now. as i'm still under recovering. a lot of things muz avoid. lyk my favourites seafoods, beans, fried foods, chicken and etc. all CANNOT EAT!!!! oh my tian. it juz seems so terrible and everything i eat now seems so bland. but no choice have to endure on. somethings are fated to go this way so juz hope things get better aft the bad lucks are gone.

and i'm gonna upload some pics taken quite some time before. but hadnt got the chance to upload. and also looking through my post. it's been also a long time i upload pics. so shall upload some today since i'm so free.



the temporary hostel near our sch.


the stripes! me and joze!


me and ana!!!


me and jin!!!


back to the top


title: bad OMEN YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sunday, May 18, 2008 AT 5/18/2008 09:04:00 PM


back for posting. always hadnt been posting for so long. mayb next time i shall update weekly so i forget things tat wanna been said. anyway recently i met my big day. which is actually not a very gd day. prediction for me for the year came through and i met my big day on mon the 12th. i think it's worst than having a sprain on my left knee. it was juz such a bad yr for me.

this time i went through hospitalisation and operation. the feeling at hospital juz sucks and den imaging eating 10 pills per meal can actually make me afraid of the medicine tat i'm eating. and imagine staying one day at the hospital also so unbearable already. yet i had stayed there for abt 6 DAYS!!!! mon to sat. ohh ohh also i forgot to mention. during my 6 days of stay at the hospital. 5 days i cant eat as i was on drip and in pain and aft operation. so medicine taste got stuck at my mouth and seriously the feeling juz sucks. it was the most torturing experience i ever had man.

=================================================
the reason i was hospitalise was becos i had this so called 'tumour' in my stomach which is non-cancerous tat it grew and grew becos there's a hole in it which cause the drinks and blood to accumulate in it and grew bigger each time. it actually grew to as big as a watermelon and the moment i look at the picture of the tumour. i felt nauseous and disgusted. and of course medication made it worst. it was a life time experience tat i will definately rmb man and i'm juz the unlucky one to get this bad omen.
=================================================

anyway now i'm much much better alr but the cut at my stomach area was too deep and ard 15 cm long. so now have to slowly wait and hopes it recover soon and fast enough. of course aft this incident. i realised a lot of things. and ppl out there pls do yearly checkup cause u might not noe wad's hidden inside u that may cause ur life to be in danger. of course although now i'm ok. sch's affected as i cant go to sch for the time being. as i couldnt walk normally and would be quite pain to sit for long hours.and now taking the exam might be a prob to me though.wondering how to solve this. altthough i had leave until 7th of june.

nvm shall take it slowly and see how it goes aft i recovered. now i understand wad pain i was going through back den when i went to laos for YEP. and sincerely thank those frens whom visited me when i'm hospitalised although i din informed u guys. thanks for the love and care and warm regards and not forgetting the time to travel down to hospital to visit me. u're all loved by me!!! muacks muacks!!! =)

back to the top